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We've all commented on how well our doodles behave with little children and babies, other dogs and animals, and most adults. And we've had our chuckles re: AARP and Senior Moments. Yesterday, Ebbe and I visited my Aunt Marcy and Uncle Dick (my late Mom's sister and her husband) who are now in nursing care. They are 84 and 86 respectively, and my Aunt has advanced Alzheimer's and health problems … my Uncle severe cardiac problems, though his mind is still good.

Much to my chagrin it had been a while since I'd seen them - never at this home. In fact for this visit I called my cousin, their daughter, to ask if I might accompany her! I had spent too much time at the nursing home with my own folks, the memories still too vivid and knew I would crumble if I had to go in by myself.

Ebbe was allowed to go because Nancy, my cousin, always takes her 3 yr old corgi/beagle mix, Sophie with her on visits. Sophie knows exactly where to go to find Aunt Marcy and Uncle Dick! (Unfortunately, now separate rooms.)

My Aunt proceeded to inform me that Ebbe wasn't a cute dog at all. Was too big. Was frightening. Her waggely tail was going to hit her in the face! That she didn't like dogs. Aunt Marcy always did tell it like it is and that horrible disease has only exacerbated this personality trait. She also accused me of lying about NOT coloring my hair, which at age 50 has very little gray in it! :? And thanked God that I finally got married … didn't think it would ever happen! :wink: Uncle Dick liked Ebbe a lot, shared Sophie's treats with her and accepted a big kiss. :)

I think Aunt Marcy associates Sophie with Nancy and doesn't consider her a dog!

The point of this long winded story … my Ebbe was the best girl! To the elderly and aides alike she didn't jump, or bark, or poke her head into anything she shouldn't. She let everyone pet her and stood still next to walkers and wheelchairs. We all took a walk around the grounds and she was so good on the leash … I never had to raise my voice! It was a long car ride to and fro and she just sat and watched the world go by.

Then once home, she stood still as I put my arms around her and sobbed. It is so terribly sad to see these wonderful people and what time and disease has done to them. As my uncle said, "It is what it is, but it's like being in jail and you didn't do anything wrong." But Ebbe and her silly face made him smile, and my sweet (yes … she really was/is) Aunt Marcy had some moments of clarity and told me I could come back, but leave the dog at home!

I'm still pretty weepy, but know I would be much worse if it weren't for my darling doodle. I was so proud of her. A comfort to the elderly (most of them), a special comfort to me. Thank you for letting me share my pride, my sadness and my love for two particular people and one particular dog!
 

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(((((((((((((((((((Mary))))))))))))))))))))))))

I'm so sorry Mary, tears are flowing for you. It is soo hard to see the ones we love decline.

My Gram and my Aunt had Alzhiemers - it was soo sad seeing them that way.

I'm glad that you made the visit and took Ebbe with you, I'm sure she was a comfort just having her along.

Ebbe it sounds like you were the perfect young lady, how wonderful

It is amazing how dogs sense things. Annabelle is normally a wild woman when she sees someone, but when we were home in June to see Daddy (89) and Norma (86), she was soo good, never jumped on them or ran them over like she tends to do with others - I was so proud of her, she nuzzled them and loved on them and let them love on her.

It is sad that the Alzhiemers has made your Aunts personality stronger and that her and your Uncle are in separate rooms - Is that hard on your Uncle or does he seem to be ok with it?
 

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Mary,
Thank you so much for sharing your joy and tears with us! It brought back good and painful memories of when Jonah went to visit my Mom in nursing home before she passed. He was so good with all the patients, no jumping, sat nice. With some of the aides....well, a little more excited. At first Mom loved Jonah coming to visit. Then it was "Easy there...this is a single bed and I'M the single". Then at the end it was a quick pet and take him over there, he's too big! Some of those later visits I couldn't have done without him!
 

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Discussion Starter #4
It is sad that the Alzhiemers has made your Aunts personality stronger and that her and your Uncle are in separate rooms - Is that hard on your Uncle or does he seem to be ok with it?
My Uncle is very tenderhearted and is quite depressed by present circumstances. He and Aunt Marcy have been married for over 61 years and they had to be separated because she was beginning to get violent toward him. They have three daughters who all live in the area and at least one is there everyday.

I HATE :twisted: HATE :twisted: HATE THIS DISEASE!!!!!

My late mom, her late brother and now her two living sisters all had/have it! And it manifests itself in so many different ways. In Mom's case, it was noted that she got sweeter and sweeter. What changed in her was that she didn't worry any more ...this was HUGE, she had been an Olympic Gold Medalist at worry! So her life actually got more peaceful toward the end.
 

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Mary, and to the rest of you too, your tender stories of love and sadness and the joy your receive from one small, loving dog, are so touching and sweet. Bitter-sweet.
Bless you all...and your wonderful doods!
 

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How sad for your uncle also to have to see his wife this way, it must be very disheartening for him :cry:

What a blessing that their children live close by and can see them often
 

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Ohhhhhhh Mary
Give more hugs and kisses to sweet Ebbe for being such a love
from Denver and me. I went through this horrible disease with my
father.
 

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Bless you Mary and Ebbe, and may you have the strength to go thru this once again...what a horrible disease to have to witness with your loved ones....I am happy that Ebbe made you so proud...dogs inner senses know how to comfort and love when the need arises, and Ebbe proved that so beautifully! Thank you for sharing your heartfelt story! :D
 

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Oh Mary, how good of you to visit. I feel so bad for folks in this situation. We recently lost my husband's mother--she was suffering from this disease as well. Now a dear friend at the lake is showing signs of memory loss. Bless Ebbe for being such a sweetheart!! I have talked to DH about Labradoodles as service dogs in hospitals. All I could imagine was some kindly but feeble little gentleman making the mistake of saying something like, "Here, puppy!" and winding up with an 80 pound Doodle, with good intentions of course, in his face . . .
 
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Mary I'm am sorry you have to go through this. I'm glad Ebbe was such a good girl and was there to comfort you and others as well
 

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((((((((((Mary))))))))) my heart goes out to you hon. I am sorry to hear of your sadness and what you're feeling is so normal as there really isn't anything you can do about it but hang in there.
Your uncle did have a very good analogy and I am HAPPY to hear EBBE was such a good girl!! These doodles for some reason sense babies and elderly people to be treated caringly and gingerly, it's truly amazing!

((((mary))))))))) hugs to you and I hope your frustration and sadness wanes in the near future.

Mary can i point one thing out to you? you have a great sense of humor okay? I know you'll find it really soon , if not i am sure you'll PM me for sure.

What your aunt said wasn't that nice but at least she has an excuse
Cause my EX mother in law would say things like that to me all the time (and her own kids too), and she's considered healthy and normal :shock: :wink:
 

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Such a terrible time in ones life, thank goodnes you have those beautiful, loving, eyes of Ebbe. Sometimes I feel you can look into those doodle eyes and see thier soul and they can see ours. May you find comfort in the time you visited yesterday.
 

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Oh Mary, what an emotional day for you. How heartwarming to hear how Ebbe handled everything and gave you support. Cali and I send big hugs.
 

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Boy what a tough day for you. We sure are proud of Ebbe for being such a good girl even if it wasn't appreciated.

I've not had to deal with Alzhiemers, but a stroke can have simular effects. I sat with my Grandmother after a major stroke and for the first time in my life she didn't pick at me. I almost wish she had. It would have been normal. Toward the end she would jabber at me like she was telling me a story but I couldn't understand a word, kind of like a toddler would. She never seemed to notice. I cried and cried after that.

Hugs and prayers to you!!!
 

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Discussion Starter #15
Thank you all for your kind and loving words. I didn't mean to be a downer with such a sad post, but was so proud of Ebbe and knew this was where I could share that pride and ALL my feelings of the day. As you could tell it took a while to shake it.

But then she was a devil in a doodle suit last night. DH and I laughed and laughed ... well, I did when she pranced around the house with his wallet in her mouth! :shock: :lol: :lol: :lol: So Miss Ebbe with her silliness to the rescue again!

Again many thanks, keep all those wonderful seniors in your thoughts and prayers.
 
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