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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
this may seem like an odd question, but I can't tell if my new puppy likes me or not! this is my first dog; previously I've only had cats. I'm used to purring to indicate happiness, LOL!
Libby Lu is 12 weeks old and I've had her for 3 1/2 weeks. She loves to play with the dogs that live upstairs from us and if given the choice she would chose them over me every time. She does like to sit on my lap when she first wakes up in the morning, though. At other times I'll reach out to pet her when she's lying down and she'll scoot just out of my reach! Does my puppy not like me?
 

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Bogie will take other dogs over me too. He's 4 months now. I also have a hard time keeping him on my lap for a long time.
I think they like us....but they're so young that they're just into anything that comes around!
Dogs are also establishing dominance when they scoot away. Did you ever stare her in the face? They turn away usually. It's part of the alpha thingie too.
I think you'll be just fine. She sounds like she has established some independence and self esteem that's not all that bad.
 

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Congrats on your new puppy, make sure you post some pics of LibbyLu

Pups love to play, so another dog is gonna be her friend :wink: As Linda said, dominance is being decided here, not only do most dogs not like to be stared at (although I had a lab who would stare me out) most also do not like having someone reach out and put their hand over the dogs head or face - shows you are being dominant.
With Annabelle, I would sit with her in my lap and pet her head while I talked softly too her and would rub her nose with 1 finger. Over time, she got better about me reaching to pet her head.

Good luck and have fun with your new pup :)
 

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If we are somewhere with other dogs, Dexter and Kirby absolutely choose them over us! At home however, they choose us humans over each other :)
 

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Denver as a puppy always chose the other dogs too
but now at 20 months he always chooses me
Why you ask????????????????
cause I am holding the tennis balls bahahahahhaaaaaaaaa
He chooses to play ball with me over any dog anytime................
Tennis balls played a huge part in teaching Denver the "Come here"
command......
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
so, she doesn't like me showing dominance by touching her head or making eye contact? that's good to know, I haven't read that in any of my training books yet. thank you! but i do want to establish that I am the pack leader somehow right?
also - I really want to post some pictures of her but i'm having a hard time with it. i'm not very computer savvy. :? but I'll keep trying.
 

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YES you do want your doggie to know you are the pack leader, but that doesnt mean you can't show her in a pleasing, friendly manner, it's always worked for me with all my dogs.

Try sitting on the floor with Libby Lu in your lap and just pet head and nose while telling her she's a good girl, do this several times a day, eventually she should be comfortable with you petting her head and or nose.

I continued to pet Annabelle on the head and nose and still do, I just do it in a calming manor and talk softly too her while I am doing it, telling her good girl or just chatting about the days events :) - I dont want my dominance to feel aggressive to her - she is fine with it now, but I still talk softly to her while I pet head and/or nose
 

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I recently read a training book by Ross Allan,
an Australian who trained German Shepherds for police
and military work.
It is a very interesting training aid....
a friend found a copy at a local Half-Priced Book Store....
it is called Dog Obedience Training.
Published in 1996 by T.F.H Publications, Inc.

I quote from his book below...
"The dog seeks to read a person's mind by looking
directly into his eyes. The dog seeking communication
with the trainer will not look at his feet or chest:
he will stare intently at the trainer's eyes,
so clearly that we must use our eyes to communicate
with the dog.
Staring at a strange aggressive dog can be
interpreted as a threat by the dog,
but this is not the case with a pet.
It is a fact that if trainer and dog have a very close
bonding the trainer can put the dog in a stay postition,
leave it walking several paces away,
then turn to face it. The trainer can then focus
on the dog, concentrating intently and looking directly
into the dog's eyes.
The trainer can hold the dog's full attention
for several minutes if necessary before breaking contact.
This little exercise takes practice and is difficult with a dog
until ilt matures, but it can be done.
Dogs who will not make good eye contact
are very difficullt to train."

He recommends sitting above the dog,
say in a chair and the dog sitting at your feet,
holding the dogs face, gently rubbing him, or scratch just
under his chin and upper chest while looking into his eyes
and talking softly to him.
I tell my girls how wonderful they are and how smart
and what things we need to work on.....sounds goofy,
but just establishing the respect and dominance,
being over them....above them.....
encouraging the dog to adore me .....
and recognize me as the pack leader/alpha dog.
So initially the importance of bonding closely with the dog is the first step in training. Mr. Allan says that spending a good three weeks really bonding with a puppy before much formal training has begun is paramount to success when training does begin.

I would think taking the time to really bond and using eye contact and simple loving commands and short sessions...repeated and repeated would pave the way for more intense training later. Now will see if my patience and my consistency holds out!
Though I have bonded well with Coco, I am really spending time
gazing into her eyes and reinforcing our closeness....since Abby joined us
I have noticed the vying for her "place" and I want Coco to know she
still answers to me, even though she has Abby answering to her.....
make sense?
8)

Just thoughts and responses to both the post and the book.
8)
 
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Wow I didn't know that touching the dogs snout and head was a show of dominance. I have always been able to do that with Maya. I was a her training class with her once and was messing around with Maya in front of the trainer and i grabbed Maya's snout and just held it. The trainer gasped....and said she is gonna bite you. I had no idea why she would say that. BTW Maya has never bit me and I still grab her snout.
 

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annabelles mom said:
Try sitting on the floor with Libby Lu in your lap and just pet head and nose while telling her she's a good girl, do this several times a day, eventually she should be comfortable with you petting her head and or nose.

I continued to pet Annabelle on the head and nose and still do, I just do it in a calming manor and talk softly too her while I am doing it, telling her good girl or just chatting about the days events :) - I dont want my dominance to feel aggressive to her - she is fine with it now, but I still talk softly to her while I pet head and/or nose
Ditto this advice ten times over!
 

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cocoandjane said:
I quote from his book below...
"The dog seeks to read a person's mind by looking
directly into his eyes. The dog seeking communication
with the trainer will not look at his feet or chest:
he will stare intently at the trainer's eyes,
so clearly that we must use our eyes to communicate
with the dog.
Thanks so much for this excerpt. In my very first post on this forum I mentioned how I chose Ozzie based on his ability to look me right in the eye without fear or aggression. I felt like he was talking to me through his eyes. Ozzie is almost 5 months now and he continues to lock eyes with me in non-verbal communication. My 2 best dogs did this, my old male lead Husky and my Lab who passed last Fall. I believe this type of eye to eye communication transcends all other.
 

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Wow this thread is very interesting. I sit with both dogs and pet their heads/snouts and talk to them all the time, but just did it because they seem to enjoy it. Neither of them (even Kirby who we've only had a few months) have any problem with us being around their face/snout (even grabbing the snout - I tried it w/Dex last night).

They both get so calm when we pet their heads/faces :)

I do need to work more on the eye contact...they will both make eye contact with us, but it's not for extended periods of time.
 

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Chouette makes eye contact with me unless I'm holding a camera, because the flash apparently bothers her. She has never minded my grabbing her anywhere, on her muzzle or tail or whatever. But she was a laid-back puppy from the time we got her. I could hold her on her back in my arms and she was fine with that. So I think each dog is different and has its own personality. But agree that you can encourage your pup to enjoy being petted the way some people have described.

Leslie
 

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Coco will look away nearly every time if I have the camera....I have to trick her into looking my direction if I want a picture of her.....she hates the flash....knows the sound of the camera turning on.....and runs!

:roll:
 

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They eye contact tidbit is interesting. During training, I always try to establish eye contact. If Charlie isn't paying attention, I put the treat under his nose and then raise my hand to my eyes and tell him to "Focus". If he clearly does not want to follow a command, he will avoid looking at me. It's kind of like a kid with his hand over his ears humming...

As to the original question, I think in the long run you will be glad that your pup is a bit independent and enjoys playing and socializing with other dogs. My doodle is totally devoted to me to the point that he cries when I go out even if other family members are in the house. :roll:

Deb
 
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DebBrown said:
. My doodle is totally devoted to me to the point that he cries when I go out even if other family members are in the house. :roll:

Deb
Maya does this too. My Mom told me Maya was inconsolable until she heard me come back. Then she was fine. However if she had to choose between another dog or me. Well I become chop liver!!! hahaha
 

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hmz819 said:
DebBrown said:
. My doodle is totally devoted to me to the point that he cries when I go out even if other family members are in the house. :roll:

Deb
Maya does this too. My Mom told me Maya was inconsolable until she heard me come back. Then she was fine. However if she had to choose between another dog or me. Well I become chop liver!!! hahaha
Heather, It's flattering but frustrating at the same time, don't you think? Now... if you were REALLY chopped liver, Maya would be all over you. :lol: A better description might be celery or onion? LOL!! But, yes, same here... another dog in the room is #1 priority.

Deb
 

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This website is so strange and wonderful. There are always threads asking the same thing i have been wondering. And this is another one. Scout is about 11 weeks old now and for the first 3 weeks of ownership i wondered exactly the same thing. Does she actually love me? She would back away when i tried to pat her head from a standing position, and she really didn't get very excited when i entered her pen area. She got far more excited when my partner went in, and that wasn't all that often in comparison to me. It really started to concern me. "Maybe she just hasn't taken to me"

But all that has changed in the last week. There is no doubting now that she is a daddy's girl. She has taken a bit to quietly whining when i am not in her pen (not a good thing but comforting for me nonetheless) and as soon as i go into the pen she is straight onto my lap for a nice long snuggle. She still doesn't like direct reaching over her head for a pat but she is getting better and she follows her dad around everywhere. She even nips less and is starting to understand 'ah ah!' as a negative command.

So my advice to you is to hang in there and keep having loving contact with your pup. She may just be settling in still, working out where she stands in the family.
 
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